Being single over the festive period sucks. Fuck all to do. Fuck all on the telly. If I had more cash, I'd go out and stand awkwardly in pubs and fucking feel my will crush when a bird checks me out and I dunno what the fuck to do because I haven't been on the pull for about 6 fuckin' years. What an epic crock of shit - all of it, eh? What the fuck do you do? It's boring as fuck. So boring I might look into a secon job or some shit to alleviate the fucking boredom, but then I'd never ever ever get out to do my own shit, would I? No, I'd be right proper fucking stuck working all the bastard time and not getting anywhere with anything or anyone. Fucking shit-hole tiny town as well, so even if I thought I'd hook up with some dirty bird from the fucking net, I can't becase there's no fucker worth looking at in a 50mile radius. Seriously, what do people do? Round here, they just fucking drink and end up fucking shit-faced and wanking into their socks or some shit because they end up fat and full of chips and shit. What the fuck? Gah. No shit, I fucking hate it. Seriously - gay as.
....I need to kidnap you.
I think I just learned enough Brit grammar and slang there to start a new character. Thanks, Ozzy!
I can well see this fuckin' rant going on and fuckin' on like a blog or some kind of continuing soap shit about my epic fails. I hope not, but there ya fucking go. Half past bastard 3 in the morning and I can't sleep because I've been bored into some kind of fucking bullshit half-catatonic gas as shit trance all fucking day. No fucking appetite again either. If I lose weight again this week I'm going to go fucking scizo. Seriously. Sick of it. The whole fucking lot. Stick it, cruel world. I'm the fucking King and one day yuou'll fucking realise it. Haha. Fuck you.
Ozzy, not that I'm the kinda guy to laugh at the misfortune of others, I literally blew my moms award-winning potato salad at the monitor...
Not laughing at your misfortune mate, just laughing at the expressive way you displayed it!!!
Cheers!!
Jon, you're such a sadist... laughing at his pain.
Some fucker has to.
Can I just hug ya? lol.
you may be single, but you should be getting an honorary Masters in Expletives in the mail in four to six weeks?
But there are so many great things about the Winter Holidays. For instance I bought you the world's smallest violin. Use it to play "My Heart Bleeds For You".
If that doesn't work I got a noose on order from Amazon.co.uk. Look for it in the mail. I told the sender to include instructions so you get it right the first time.
How about you make me a fuckin' instructional DVD, fucktard :P
Because my own small town of fucking boring nothingness is running out of small children for me to exploit.
You're horrible, Dave. :D
Quote from: Osbourne Kilminster on December 28, 2009, 01:36:44 PM
How about you make me a fuckin' instructional DVD, fucktard :P
HAHAHAHAHA Ozzy!!!! Fucking Brilliant!!!!
But Alas, no dvd for Dave... For him we got a copy of "The Secret"....
What the fuck is it about girls, particularly ex-gfs, that makes them think they can pick a fight with you and then turn it on you and be all "leave me alone, I can't cope with the arguing". Like, oh fucking really, you thick shit bitch? Don't fuckign text me your gay-ass little rants because I don't feel completely comfortable being your best fucking friend or whatever shit. Treat me like shit and think I'm going to fucking bend over backwards for you, or maybe bend over forwards so you can fucking ass rape me or whatever? Fuck's sake.
The double standard known as the woman's prerogative.
New Year in with a bang. Luck is changing. Thank fuck.
well fucking maybe fucking not. You think you're onto a winner and playing things real cautiously with good advice from the only people you can trust, but no. Her issues crop up. Then she brings up the fact that I don't feel compelled to knife my ex in her sleep or some crazy shit. So now, if I'm lucky, I've got a fuck buddy and, at worst, I've got fuck all but a pub I can't go into anymore as she works behind the bar. Class. Fucking ace, you twat, Zig. Fucked up right fucking royally this time, mate. Fuck you.
Don't ya just fucking love those Saturday nights when you just fucking KNOW a girl you really like is out hunting and will probably be bouncing on some other fucker's cock in a matter of hours? I do. Fucking love 'em.
Rid yourself of psycho bitches.
Quote from: Sinn on January 23, 2010, 06:00:01 PM
Rid yourself of psycho bitches.
Ya know, I have been told the same quite a bit recently... I split with my woman a while back, and damn did she get crazy! lol
if a girl says she basically doesn't envision things ever going beyond fuck buddies, and you go along with it, what are the chances of her finding herself attached to you and wanting more if the arrangement continues over an extended period of time?
To be frank...in a situation like that, you're the in-between guy until she finds someone she really wants. Chances of it progressing beyond fuck-buddies/friends is slim at best. I know it's a small town, but keep your prospects open for others.
But, I hope tomorrow goes well for you.
Quote from: Sinn on January 25, 2010, 08:59:58 PM
To be frank...in a situation like that, you're the in-between guy until she finds someone she really wants. Chances of it progressing beyond fuck-buddies/friends is slim at best. I know it's a small town, but keep your prospects open for others.
But, I hope tomorrow goes well for you.
What she said. :hug: Hope things improve for you.
I feel terrible putting all my shit up on here and would completely understand if you guys felt I'm dragging the board down with my misery and all that stuff. Maybe it's amusing to people who're like "he's such a dick! look at him!" and, in truth, I have to agree. I know I make piss poor choices. Anyway, I post shit here because my facebook just isn't safe because if I put anything on there, I get texts from people I don't want them from (but daren't delete from my supposed friends list) and I don't have a blog or anything.
At any rate, I apologise to Joyce, in the first instance, because she's always there and has been for literally years. Must be two years or so now that she's always been there to calm me down and listen to me and give solid advice. Brutal truth, but she knows that it's always best to hear it how it is and I respect that so much.
In the second instance, I cut off a bit sharp mid-conversation last night when the girl text me to ask me to her pub for a chat. kinda knew it wouldn't be good because there was no 'x' on it, but there ya go. I should have said "no, fuck you", but I didn't. She basically told me that despite earlier suggesting we see how things progress with an open mind , she'd changed her mind and was completely ruling out any possibility of advancement. Kinda gutted and put on the spot, I agreed to go along with the whole casual fucking thing. So I went home and she came around after her shift, we got in a bit of "cardio" and then ended up talking.
Now, she makes out she's all honest and frank and tells it like it is, but she really doesn't take it too well when it's the same both ways. She asked me what my mates and bro thought about it all and I told her they'd probably slap my across the back of the head for being an idiot for going along with something I know I absolutely know is going nowhere, with someone who can't make up her fucking mind what she wants from one minute to the next. I could tell she was pissed off and, for a split second, I thought the ice had cracked and she might cry. If she had, I might have smiled or something. Just to see her feel a bit shit would have made me feel better about it all, but no. Didn't happen, not that I saw.
She decided she had to go home to get shit ready for doing stuff today, but it was probably BS. I got a text this morning saying she's out because things won't work out with me. Truth is, I'd typed out a smiliar text to send to her about five times and deleted it last night because I really liked her and still hoped shit would work out, somehow, despite what everyone has told me.
I'm gutted beyond anything I'd expected. Getting through my workout was Hell and my training buddy felt awkward because I looked like shit and my head wasn't in it. I can't deal with this shit. I thought getting dumped by a gf of 5 1/2yrs at the end of last year had toughened me up and made me colder than I really am, I suppose. She left her watch here and I'll have to deal with that at some point. Might tell a friend to drop it into her pub. If I see her, gay fucking fag emo shit as it sounds - I'm not going to let her see me crack up. No girl can ever see that again.
I just don't see being able to do the whole find 'em, fuck 'em, send 'em packing thing. Yeah, a good shag is always nice, but to be told by someone you'd grown to like that all they want from you is that just fucking sucks. I dunno what the fuck is up with women or what the fuck is up with me. I could fucking punch myself.
That sucks. If you need to vent, you know we're always here, Oz. This is your family... and we never judge.
Thank you :)
:) *hugs*
Bah. I judge all I want. I spread misery around the internet like it's an STD and I'm a high school cheerleader. Next time some girl plays you like that man toss her a twenty dollar bill and say "As bad as you were I should be getting change whore". Then literally kick her ass out of bed.
And if both people agree up front to have sex but no "dating relationship special fuzzy heart feelings" then go for it. If you can't keep it straight then you feel too much and need some waterfall meditating. Zen Buddha Pimp Style Bitches!
from experience and observation, it's pretty much impossible for the fuckbuddy thing to work out. unless it's very short term, somebody always winds up developing something.
it's strange to say that working in a titty bar's given me a greater understanding and sympathy of men, but it has. and also, appreciation for the nice guys... though i can usually pinpoint right where they go wrong. and, that there are more similarities than there are differences between men and women.
It's a long story to tell, but I think I've got this girl all worked out. Her last relationship was during an intense 12-week Police training thing where they all had to stay residentially and do stuff. She had a hard time and some guy stuck up for her and stuff developed, initially as the fuck buddy thing but she fell head over heels for him, somehow. Apparently, it went on, they got jobs in different areas of the country and kept metting up, then both applied for a job at the same place, which I think made her feel like shit might proper work out for them. The problem was he had a long-term GF and kids who he'd never actually leave. She told me of an instance where thye were both in bed, post-cardio, and the guy's GF phoned and asked if they were finished, but he said no and I think that really hurt the girl. The job thing didn't work out as he got it and she didn't and her love remained unrequited, tragically. That was 6 months ago and she still bristles if it's mentioned, despite going on and on about it all the time herself.
He's apparently a really muscular dude with a shaved head and proper into the MMA thing, so I think when she met me at New Year, she didn't see me at all, but a substitute for him. She wanted to do a relationship thing with me, at first, because I think she thought it was the closest she'd get to being with him? I dunno. Then, when she realised that wasn't going to work, she started to bail, but I didn't have all the pieces to work out why. I thought she liked me for me, fool that I am.
Write an arrpee and let it go...
Quote from: V on January 28, 2010, 07:22:54 AM
from experience and observation, it's pretty much impossible for the fuckbuddy thing to work out. unless it's very short term, somebody always winds up developing something.
it's strange to say that working in a titty bar's given me a greater understanding and sympathy of men, but it has. and also, appreciation for the nice guys... though i can usually pinpoint right where they go wrong. and, that there are more similarities than there are differences between men and women.
Funny you say that, another good piece of advice for women everywhere...don't fuck with a guy's head too much, or you might end up with a knife in your ribs.
Been stabbed a few times, eh?
Hahaha, only once and I learned my lesson right fast.
I wish I could say a bunch of well-wishing shit about how things will get better, but they probably won't. Most, if not all, the good guys in the world get shit on. It's like they attract the bottom feeding gold digger sluts who only want to ride the pole and then move on.
Once in a while though, they luck out, and find a keeper. Maybe this'll happen for you, Oz. Maybe it won't.
Only the Gods know for sure.
I go with older women. It's better that way.
This last one was older than me by 2yrs. A fucked-up bitch is a fucked-up bitch. Age is just a number.
Quote from: Osbourne Kilminster on January 28, 2010, 04:50:19 PM
This last one was older than me by 2yrs. A fucked-up bitch is a fucked-up bitch. Age is just a number.
Damn skippy.
and a whore is a whore. Remember never tip her because they overcharge anyways.
You just have to be an absolute out-and-out fucking twat about everything, don't you? No, seriously. Yeah, a bit of fucking banter and sarcasm and shit online is cool, but not here and not fucking now. Fuck you. I'm glad your life is so fucking perfect that all my shit merely provides moderate amusement for you, so why don't you go and fucking live it and keep the fuck away from what you don't know, you ignorant fucking cunt.
Dude take a deep breath. You want the truth? Here is the truth: Yes I am a jackass with little patience for people bitching about how bad they feel. The reason why? I spent several years doing nothing but bitching and feeling sorry for myself and it got me jack squat shit nowhere. I wasted my life and opportunities to be happy.
So what I do with folks who insist on being mopey? I keep tossing bad jokes at them until they crack and just fucking laugh at themselves and their situation. Because when you start laughing at your problems you start moving past them. It's real therapy and real help as opposed to the "awww poor baby yeah life sucks" pity shit everyone else gives you. Everyday of my life I wake up unhappy and go to bed unhappy or too tired to feel unhappy. I spend half the day lost in fiction, sometimes of my own creation, because I know all too keenly that reality is nothing but endless cruelty and if I stay there I will kill myself. I nearly did it several times before.
Life Sucks. People Are Assholes. It will never stop and the only way you will ever stop hurting is to learn to laugh at pain because then the pain washes off. If you don't laugh you die young. So I'm the court jester of the human race. I take the rotten fruit and heckling so that the rest of you are better off. You may not believe me, you may not get it but it's the facts.
Ask Lisa, Ask Sinn. I care more about people than I should and have suffered just as much bullshit as anyone else. The difference is I welcome it because if I'm hurting it means someone else has made themselves feel better and being a target is the only thing I've ever been good at so I accept the job.
I feel bad that you have to pour that out. Truly, I do.
I operate differently, I suppose. I'm always in a position where I have to accept it. It's like a mutual embrace or some kind of twisted, impossible double choke-hold and whoever lasts longest wins. Pain always wins. ALWAYS. Sometimes, I just have to let it rape me because I eventually come to realise that all the fighting isn't going to help me. After each instance, I just hope that the worst I'm left with is a new scar and another bitter seed of resentment to add to the collection.
Poking and prodding and mocking isn't helpful to me, even though it may be to you. If nobody at all ever replied or said anything here, I'd be cool with it because it's just an outlet for me rather than a big old lake to fish for sympathy. I'm stuck in a little flat or apartment or whatever and I don't have a big posse of close friends who I can trust or turn to and these walls are going to get sick of hearing me roar and sob and yell and if they weren't solid fucking stone I'd smack shit out of them.
Loud Static-X seems to help a little bit.
Loud Disturbed tends to make it easier for me to concentrate when the brain won't shut up. lol.
Maybe you're right. I used to love "The Game", but now the poignance is almost inescapable.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nP2aPipQmo8&feature=related
i've hit the point of telling anyone who make anything like date-like advances to die in a fire. regardless of gender, race, religion, ect. not a phase. been the modus operandi for years now.
yeah, i'm gonna die alone. i'm kinda alright with that. don't we all, really, regardless?
Fuck it. For fucking real. I'm out tonight. My tight T-shirt is picked out ready. Daren;t wear a Tapou one again as it attracts crazies, but a nice plain black one. Makes my arms look massive. Ha. See what 12hr skank I can pull. Got to tak the advice of MANY mates and LEARN to find 'em, fuck 'em, flip 'em. Gotta learn to be so cold I make Wayne Static seem like a bigass radiator.
Good plan. Always makes me feel better to do a mindfuck after being mindfucked myself. :)
Mindfuck? Really? Got me thinking about Criss Angel's fake magic now. LOL
Mad. Mental, evening. Sat around in pubs with my training partner, who was freezing his fucking knackers off because he didn't have a coat... a guy dressed as a Blues Brother who looked more like Winston Churchill... and another kid dressed as fucking Spiderman.
Still. Avoided the neccessary pub and had a laugh. Got felt up (a bit) by a hot hot chick who happens to have a long-term BF, so I didn't pursue but regret it now. I'd have served time for that one. A jury would weep when she recounted her ordeal. Oh fucking yes...
Still. Fell asleep knelt over my toilet. Classy!
Pace yourself with the alcohol. >_< Hangovers are not something you want to repeat more than once.
(http://photos-g.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs132.snc3/17934_442107130653_531640653_10755974_4948223_n.jpg)
What chance do I have with this kinda bunch? Haha. Bless 'em, they're sound kids.
Wow. lol. Just wow.
With them, I'd normally say you have no chance in Hell. :D
Uhm... ok. Who goes out dressed like Spiderman?!
I had 2 beers on an empty stomach last nite at karaoke. I was nicely wasted. Killer headache today though. :(
Quote from: Osbourne Kilminster on January 31, 2010, 03:40:09 PM
(http://photos-g.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs132.snc3/17934_442107130653_531640653_10755974_4948223_n.jpg)
What chance do I have with this kinda bunch? Haha. Bless 'em, they're sound kids.
:D I'd hang with ya'll like that I'm all about some nerdiness ;D
They went to a fancy dress party before deciding to come out 'round town. It's not every day you see people walking around like that in Ross. Bless 'em.
In other news, a shit day today as the mate I was supposed to be hanging with this evening bailed on me and left me bored out of my fucking mind all bastard day. So, I got mulling over what psycho girl was saying at different points and pairing it up with the kind of people who were out and about last night... turns out a very small part of it may have held some truth. Well, the bit where she reckoned having a skull display central to my living room and having Pinhead action figures sat on top of my wardrobes and wearing hoodies with skulls and demons and stuff could really scare a lot of people away. Girls especially. I kind of had to step aside from myself and look at the image I portray to other people and I can kind of see it.
So, I took a sledgehammer to my skulls. It's a weird thing swinging a sledgehammer indoors... And I bundled up a load of my clothes and took 'em to the charity shop. Got quite a few of my toys on eBay too. Part of me feels good about it in that I might have more luck in meeting people and keeping them around, even after they've been to my place, but then a part of me feels like a total fucking sell-out.
Can't win with this shit, can I?
Aww... you shoulda said something. I would have taken those hoodies off your hands.
I'm now at a point where most of the stuff that needs to go has gone. Still got some stuff on eBay and probably a little more to go on, as and when I get to rummaging through my specific collections and thinning them out. Pretty much down to a single, solitary display case with all my cool stuff in it. It really, really sucks. It's nice having a stack of PayPal, but that won't last forever.
so... like last saturday, some girl pretty much threw herself at me and I didn't rebuff her, but I showed no interest because I thought she had a long-term BF. Then I found out she didn't and then tonight, my mate text me to say she's out. Turns out she was in a different place to us by the time I got out and I wasn't fucking paying to get into two places. Gay as. What a jib.
Ah well, maybe you'll have better luck next time, hon.
It gets fucking worse. Joy of motherfucking joys.
So that skank bitch from New Year etc goes to the same gym as me, I forget if I'd previously mentioned, and much awkwardness ensues when she's around. The fact that she's there, all staring and eavesdropping doesn't bother me so much anymore, but the guy who runs the gym is kind of a mate of mine (or so I thought) and keeps on making the kind of jokes and suggestions that don't help me out too much and make me actually think to myself "you know, dude, if the boot was on the other foot, I wouldn't say this kind of shit to you" all about going over there and pestering her for a shag and whatnot which I find completely inappropriate. Worse still, my ex of 5 1/2yrs is kind of a mate still and has resumed going to the gym and endured an awkward situation where she was there at the same time as the aforementioned skank, but the gym owner cottoned onto it and made even worse suggestions to me in front of a lot of people, including a girl who happens to be a friend of my ex.
I told my training partner, who works for him, that I'm pissed off with it and it got back to him and now we're not on speaking terms, so tonight I told my training buddy I'm cancelling my membership. I can't hang around there anymore with that fucking whore and then him winding me up and then blanking me as he is now. Fuck it.
Let's see how quick I can drop 50lbs now I have no gym.
You're not gonna drop the weight...and this shit makes me want to take a trip to across the pond to do some skank-strangling. it doesn't help your situation to have lewd comments from Mr. Peanut-Gallery either.
In the mean time, you can always get the prison-workout from Ron if you're not gonna hit the gym anymore. They can at least tide you over until you get a weight-set or find a new gym.
Just don't lose hope, darlin. I know life may seem shitty now and it may stay that way for a while, but remember we're all here for you. You've got friends that care about you.