Grumble (random venting)

[Thingybloke]

Those of you who've got me on Facebook might have noticed that 1) I haven't been on this last week and 2) I have a note on my profile saying that it's my second account, as I forgot the login to the first and the email address I signed up with is long since deleted.

Point 1 is just because this week has generally been a mad rush of one unexpected crapload after another and my only net time has been for relaxing, which Facebook rarely is. But, something's happened while I've been off FB.

As for point 2... one of the many reasons I stopped logging on the my original FB account was because I got a friend invite from someone I haven't spoken to in years, and have some complicated history with - namely, my father. I won't bore you with the details, but at that point I really wasn't sure if or how I could have him be a part of my life again. At the same time though I didn't want to hurt him by actively declining the request. He and I have already hurt each other plenty, and there's no need to add to that.

So I checked my emails yesterday, and discovered that my dad has sent a friend invite to my new account at some point over this last week, when I haven't been on. And now I dunno what to do. I'm not cutting off the new account, but I have no fucking clue how I'm going to talk to him or what I'm going to say. I'm not really looking for advice, since none of you know my dad or the circumstances surrounding our estrangement. I just needed to basically write this shit out for catharsis. My girlfriend thinks I should just decline his request and forget about it, but she's never met him. If I asked them my mam, and my dad's sisters, would no doubt have a similar opinion as my girlfriend and they all know him very well indeed (and none of them like him that much). But even so... he's my dad, y'know? I still love him. And for all the shit that's happened he and I do still get on. Or, did anyway, when I was a younger man, and I'm sure we still would.

I really wish this had come in a week which wasn't loaded with other unexpected shit and I had a clearer head to think about it :/

[Jackson]

:hug: I'm here for you, Sam... if you need to vent or whatever. I think we all are.

[Thingybloke]

Thanks hon <3

I'm probably just being a dumbass, but it's been a stressful week and having some big reconciliation with my dad is something I could really do with leaving off the priority list for a few days XD

[V]

i'm kinda on the other side of the coin.

found my uncle on facebook earlier today.  just kinda looked, and bookmarked, and...

my uncle that's eleven years older than me and eleven years younger than my dad and, since i was mostly raised by grandparents, much more a big brother.

my mom keeps telling me i should contact them again.  they hate my mom.  they'd hate me talking to my mom.  they'd hate pretty much everything about my life.

i am who i am and my life might not be the best, but it was formed out of a long line of choices made from weighing what felt most important to me, even if my loved ones didn't feel the same.  i remember the last time i spent time around the grandparents.  it was a bunch of sitting around trying not to talk about anything because when i censored what they didn't want to hear because they'd worry about me, there was nothing else left.  i'm not ashamed of my life... but that... still smarts to do.

my uncle came out of the closet a few years back, i heard.  i was happy for him.  i was probably the only one.

so i wonder sometimes.

but hey.  why rock the boat.

[Thingybloke]

Good luck with whatever you decide to do with that situation, Kore.


Oh families. Nowt quite so fucked up is there. Whatever happns though I guess I'll always have the comfort that my family could never be as screwed up as my girlfriend's family. If someone wrote a book of their last four generations, people would hate it for being so ludicrously, impossibly melodramatic at every possible turn. Then again I'm sure there's a shit ton of families like that out there. The fact it's so huge doesn't help. She has something ridiculous like 50 cousins. I was at her nan's 80th birthday and there was literally something like 300 people there and that was pretty much just one side of the family, and there were entire branches who wouldn't be in the same room as other branches at the same time...

[Thingybloke]

More fun, at the end of a shit day, after a shit week: My computer might possibly be buggered. I'm trying some things, but please consider this an advance apology if I don't manage to get anything worthwhile up for the coming show. Morrigan, same goes for 21. I'm sorry. With any luck though I'll get everything fixed later today, as it's a software fault rather than a hardware fault.

UPDATE: Not exactly fixed, but I have a workaround which is serving fine.